i hate feeling like this.

i feel like im about to cry all the time. and im jsut anxious and angry and worried. i guess unsettled is the word. unstable maybe.

maybe i spend to much time alone here. and its rather sad that when im not alone here. im simply working. with odd awkward weird ppl who quite honestly are so nice but just palin freak me out.

i do not want to grow up and work at meijers. i do not want to ruin the good things i have going for me. i do not want to change anymore. i do not want to fail.

i guess. its weird. beacuse i love living here. i lovve soem of the things that are happening to me. but im so afraid to mess them up.

somehow right now i feel like i am doing absolutly nothing with my life.